Soulstar & Self Recovery

As much as I loved w**e, w**e didn’t love me.

When I was 50, I stopped drinking.

There wasn’t a grand announcement or a birthday promise. There was a week of partying, late nights and a body that was asking me to listen.

One day, a glass of w**e would feel fine. Another day, it could leave me unable to get out of bed.

Eventually, I paused long enough to hear myself.
This doesn’t feel good for me anymore.

I haven’t spoken much about it because drinking is a personal choice. This is simply part of my self-recovery story.

What surprised me most was noticing the moments when I wanted a drink.

A difficult day at work.
A party where I felt unsure of myself.
A wedding where a glass of w**e might give me the confidence to walk into the room.

I didn’t drink all the time. But when I stopped, I began to see what I sometimes asked that glass to do for me.

Soften the discomfort. Quiet the thoughts. Help me feel brave.

Without it, I had to get curious.

What am I feeling? What am I afraid of? What do I actually need?

Sometimes I needed rest. Sometimes reassurance. Sometimes a boundary, a conversation or a good cry. Sometimes I needed to go to the party and discover that I could be there as myself, nerves and all.

That hasn’t always been comfortable. There were feelings I’d become very good at moving away from. Learning to stay with myself has taken practice.

Pausing before reaching for something.
Listening to my body before pushing through.
Facing my fears gently, without demanding that I suddenly become fearless.

And learning that my needs deserve my attention.

For me, self-recovery is becoming more fully myself. Being able to laugh freely, feel honestly, say when something hurts and recognise when I’ve had enough.

I’m still becoming. Still finding the places where I leave myself behind. Still learning how to come back.

But there is something powerful about walking into a room and knowing that the person showing up is you.

This is part of my coming home.
What is your relationship with the thing that you hide behind the most?

Janie
Soulstar come home to yourself.

What can an hour of massage and breathwork give you?

An hour where you don’t have to hold everything together. Where someone listens to you, your body, and what you need that day.

For your mind…
Space to step away from the noise. To follow your breath instead of the next thought, the next job, the next demand.

For your body…
Care through touch. An invitation to soften your jaw, lower your shoulders and notice where you’ve been holding on. Massage and gentle, guided breathing working together, at your pace.

For your spirit…
A moment to reconnect with the person beneath all the roles and responsibilities. To remember what it feels like to simply be you.

You might arrive feeling busy, tense or miles away from yourself. You might leave feeling softer, clearer, more present.

This is why I bring breath into bodywork. Because the whole of you deserves care.

Soulstar more than massage.
Come home to yourself.

I am currently residing in the “joys” of Preston hospital. A quick trip to A & E on Friday soon turned sour with over 5 hrs of no pain relief, and then a late night trip to theatre and not to see a musical more a surgical team.

The surgical team were without doubt beyond phenomenal. the food however is pants but I am on a quiet ward and I am taking gratitude where ever I can, as at a very busy hospital everything is slow apart from surgery which with a mass temp spike was organised at a speed of knots and the whole team really rallied round.

I was mega grateful to come round from surgery at 2am to my clan waiting to tell me they were all there. I will not be in Soulstar this week so will be in touch with every one and will make sure every one gets rebooked in. It’s going to be a few days before I get my head together and also before I know to much more as more surgery ahead. So for now we march forward well not literally I haven’t been out of bed yet but everything crossed all is stabilising and I might even get to visit the loo today!

Thank you warriors of the world and see you all soon. Xx

Same table. A couple of years later. And still saying, “Can you imagine?”

CH and I sat at this exact table in San Marco after our very first Sacred Rhythms event.

It had been small and intimate. Sound, breathwork, Qigong and energy awareness. We came away absolutely buzzing full of life, possibility and so many what ifs.

We could feel something beginning.

And somewhere in that conversation, we said, “We need to share this.”

Recently, after a corporate event, we passed San Marco again.

“Can you remember that conversation?”

So we went back in. Sat at the same table. And started dreaming again.

Only this time, we had something to look back on. The spaces we’ve held. The people we’ve met. The locations, the feedback, the moments that have stayed with us. From our first solstice gathering to this year’s event at Nab Cottage.

For a moment, we let ourselves take it in.

We had actually built some of those what ifs.

Then came the next questions. Where do we want to take Sacred Rhythms? What do we want people to feel? What else could we create together?

We manifested again, just as we had at that first meeting.

And laughed about the red thread running through it all. Because even in those early days, when we first met, one of our conversations was:

“Imagine if we started running events together…”

Now we understand more deeply what we are creating.

Experiences. Journeys. Coming home to yourself.
Connection and community. A space to feel alive in your own body.

With some fantastic new venues becoming available and the dream of Nab continuing to unfold, we are so excited to see this next chapter take flight.

And if you’ve watched our events and quietly thought, “Can I? Could I?”

You absolutely can.

You don’t need to know how to dance, how to meditate or what you’re supposed to feel. You can arrive curious. You can arrive unsure. You can arrive exactly as you are.

If you need space to step out of your head and come home to yourself, keep coming.

If you want to breathe, connect, move freely, find your energy or put down what you’ve been carrying even for an hour we will hold those spaces.

That first “can you imagine?” brought us here.

And there is so much more we can imagine.

Sacred Rhythms | Beats, breath and a journey home.

There is nothing “just” about the breath.

I’ve used “Just Breathe” on posters, in captions and in those moments when I thought just taking a breath was the answer.

But the more I work with the breath, the smaller that word “just” feels.

These days it’s more…
Wow, breathe.
Let’s breathe.
Saved by the breath.

Something so ordinary. Something we do thousands of times every day, without even thinking. And yet consciously connecting to it can feel extraordinary.

Our body keeps us breathing automatically. Perhaps that’s why we take it so much for granted. Until we pause long enough to notice.

Am I holding my breath?
Is it shallow? Hurried?
Can I let it move without forcing it?
How does it feel to sit here, with myself?
Early on this week through Sacred Rhythms, I guided around 50 people through a purpose-built breathwork session, with Christopher bringing in the music.

Somatic practices met Afro beats. We explored nervous system awareness, noticed where we were, and moved into a deeper connection with ourselves. Then came consciously connected breathing, carried by Faithless and Insomnia.

Some people were keen. Some were unsure. Many had never experienced breathwork before.

And there we were, together. Stepping out of thinking for a while and noticing what was happening inside. What we were holding. Where we were bracing. What it felt like to soften.

There wasn’t a moment that felt like “just breathe.”

It felt like “here we are, breathing.”
Present. Connected. Making room for ourselves. Sitting with the comfortable and the uncomfortable. Breathwork isn’t always easy to begin with, but hyper tension and burn out aren’t either and until we get comfortable with recognising where we are we walk a fine line.

If you haven’t tried breathwork, this is my invitation: begin by noticing your own breath. No performance. No need to make anything happen.

Is being with yourself comfortable? Unfamiliar? Is there a little restlessness when you stop filling every moment and sit beside your own energy?

You can meet that gently. At your pace.

Our current events are full, but new dates, new ventures, new venues and new offerings are coming very soon.

Are you ready to go a little deeper into you?

Soulstar
Come home to yourself.

The road to self recovery and wellness doesn’t have to start with grand gestures to the self.

It can start with tiny moments, small habits and taking a pause…..

Make this month count and take even a few seconds for you not some days every day.