Marriage Tipps, by Dr David m

Let me talk about African male masculinity. And the unwritten rules nobody taught us but we all somehow follow.

There is a certain way African men operate that the rest of the world will never understand.

Take sleeping arrangements. If circumstances force two men to share a bed, there are laws. Ancient laws. Unspoken but fully understood by every African man.

Rule one. You sleep fully dressed. If you came in trousers, you sleep in trousers. If you have a jacket, the jacket stays on. There is nothing like changing into something comfortable. Comfort is not the assignment. Survival is.

Rule two. There must be a clear demarcation. An invisible border drawn down the middle of that bed that neither party shall cross. You stay on your side. I stay on mine. The demilitarized zone in the middle remains untouched.

Rule three. You sleep facing opposite directions. Your head here. His head there. Or both of you staring at opposite walls like you are in a disagreement. Eye contact at night is forbidden.

Rule four. Minimal movement. You wake up in the exact position you slept in. You do not toss. You do not turn. You do not stretch. You lie there stiff like a soldier until morning, even if your arm goes numb.

And the African man does all this without anyone teaching him. It is in the blood. Passed down through generations. Encoded in our DNA.

Even greetings have rules. A hug between African men is a quick tap. Pat pat. Release immediately. Three seconds maximum. Anything longer requires an explanation.

Now is this toxic masculinity? Is it cultural conditioning? Is it just how we were raised? I do not know.

But I do know that every African man reading this is nodding. Because you know these rules. You have lived these rules. You will pass these rules to your sons.

Some things need no teaching.
They are simply understood.
The bed has borders.
Respect them.

—Dr-David❤️ (like and comment)

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