The Mystic Peach

Let’s avoid a SH*TUATION, shall we? 😂🍑

When you come for your Brazilian, please arrive FRESH. AS. A. DAISY. 🌸

Think of it like the dentist or the gynecologist — you’re brushing your teeth, freshening up, and handling your business BEFORE you get here. 😭

No leftover crumbs.
No funky surprises.
No “well, she’s been through a lot today.” 💀

And babe… we literally leave you a feminine wipe for a little freshen-up before your service. USE HER. She’s golden. ✨

Need to keep one in your purse? We sell those little beauties too. Because you just never know when a s**tuation may arise. 😂

Thank you for your cooperation.
The Peach appreciates you. 🍑🤍

🍑 PEACH, PLEASE! 🍑

I’m TERRIBLE at upselling products… but this one I will absolutely fight you on. 😂

If you’re getting your spray tan at The Mystic Peach and then going home and moisturizing with Aveeno, Lubriderm or CeraVe… WE NEED TO TALK. 😩

You’re spending $60 on a good-ass tan. KEEP THE TAN.

Peach, Please! was specially formulated for spray-tanned skin to:

✨ Hydrate + nourish
✨ Extend the life of your tan
✨ Keep your colour smoother + more even
✨ Help prevent premature fading + speckling

And because these things matter to me: Canadian-made ingredients 🇨🇦 + cruelty-free 🐰

Drugstore lotion is not formulated to maintain your spray tan — so why risk sabotaging it?!

This is your sign. Get the tan extender. Love the tan. Keep the tan. 🍑

I’m not upselling you. I’m literally trying to stop you from ruining what you just paid me $60 for. 😂

POV: You’ve chosen your addiction. 🍑

At The Mystic Peach, we don’t judge. We don’t care what you do after work, what you do after hours, or what questionable decisions you make on weekends. 😂

But if you’re gonna be addicted to something… SPRAY TANS ARE A PRETTY SOLID CHOICE.

I know because I’m personally addicted. I spray tan every two weeks like it’s a standing appointment with my serotonin. 😂

So if you’re looking for a new obsession, may I suggest one that leaves you glowing, bronzed, and feeling hot AF?

Come get addicted to looking like you just got back from vacation. ✈️☀️

Book your spray tan at The Mystic Peach — link in bio. 🍑

Give yourself something to love. 💅🏼

Okay guys, it’s Tuesday — which means the Mystic Peach work week has officially begun. 🍑

And honestly, I figured we should start the week with a laugh because EVERYWHERE we look lately, the world has fully entered its “what the actual f**k is happening?” era. 😂

Social media? Unhinged.
The news? Unhinged.
Politics? ABSOLUTELY UNHINGED.
Lake Ontario? Apparently even she’s getting a rebrand. 💀

So you know what? Let’s make this easy.

Forget Lake Ontario. Forget the confusion. Forget the chaos.

Welcome to THE MYSTIC PEACH. 🍑🌊

Because everything about the Mystic Peach is lovely, and frankly, I think this name has a beautiful ring to it.

Raise your hand if you agree. 🙋🏼‍♀️🍑

Happy Tuesday, babes. We’re gonna need the laughs this week. 😂

📚✨ BACK-TO-SCHOOL PREP STARTS NOW ✨📚

Whether you’re a student, a teacher, or just someone who likes to enter September looking put together instead of held together… this is your week. 😂

Get the brows done. Lift those lashes. Handle the little things now so you can roll into next week on low-maintenance bliss. 💅🏼

This lash lift + tint lasts 6–8 weeks, comes with your choice of black or blue-black tint, and we finish every lift with a keratin treatment because healthy lashes are ALWAYS the priority. 🖤

A few spots with Hannah this week + Friday & Saturday availability with Sheila!

Consider this your sign to get your s**t together. 🍎😂

BABE. This is why we EXFOLIATE. 🔑🍑

We are trying to avoid these compromising situations at ALL costs. You need a routine: exfoliate, hydrate, repeat.

And lucky for you, we’ve got the goods:
🍑 Peach Please! Exfoliating Sugar Scrub
🧖‍♀️ Dry brushes
✨ Ingrown serums in basically every scent imaginable

There is officially NO excuse for neglecting your exfoliation routine.

Take care of your peach.

Slayed by Sheila

You want to get your brows done but don’t know what to pick? Easy, start off with a basic shape & hybrid tint
The magic & benefits of a brow tint…..
🍑Defines eyebrows: Can make sparse or undefined eyebrows look more prominent and bold
🍑Covers grey & blonde hairs: Can even out the color of eyebrows and cover up unwanted pesky greys
🍑Enhances natural beauty: Can make the face look younger and more defined by enhancing the natural beauty of the eyebrows
What Sheila did here
Brow shape + Hybrid Tint
Set with Mystic Peach Brow Gel
Link in bio to book

It is genuinely insane to me that I skimmed through math class with the absolute bare minimum. I think a 50 was a pass and I got, like, a 52. 🥹👏 Just enough to grab my diploma and get the hell out of there.

BUT PUT ME IN THE SPRAY TAN LAB?!?!

Suddenly I’m f**king Einstein.

“Okay, so we’re gonna take a 14% DHA and mix it 50/50 with a 9%, which gives us 23, divide by 2 and BOOM—11.5% DHA.”

Excuse me???????? WHO TAUGHT ME THAT????? Certainly not the woman who spent Grade 11 math asking if I could just do an extra credit assignment and leave.

Then I’m over here like:

🧪 A little violet
🧪 A little blue
🧪 A tiny drizzle of gold
🧪 Shake that bitch up

AND BOOM. A REAL SEXY TAN.

God really said, “You’re not going to be good at traditional learning, babe, but give this bitch a spray tan gun and suddenly she’s a f**king chemist.”

A stupid chemist, obviously.

But a chemist nonetheless. 👩🏼‍🔬✨

A little August nail dump featuring just a few of the cutesy, creative, and downright adorable sets Hanna has been slaying this month 💅✨

Of course, this isn’t even close to all of them… just a few sweet little moments from August 🥹🫶

We’ve still got a few spots left this week with Hanna, so if your nails are looking a little sad and neglected, this is your sign 😂

✨ Gel X
✨ Gel overlays
✨ Basic art
✨ Advanced art
✨ Custom art
✨ Basically, if you can dream it, we can probably nail it 💅

Go creep these sets, pick your fave, and book your appointment through the link in our bio! 🍑

Am I the only business owner who feels like they’re constantly in competition with themselves? 😂 Like… do we all lie awake staring at the ceiling plotting our next chess move, or am I in desperate need of a Xanax and a solid sleep 💀

I’m always craving more. Bigger. Better. The next move. The next level. Mediocre has simply never been my vibe, and apparently neither has being satisfied. 😂

I’ve got some exciting things up my sleeve, some bigger opportunities on the horizon, and maybe even another location 👀🍑

And honestly? I don’t spend much time worrying about what everyone else is doing. Everyone else is growing small potatoes—I’m over here trying to grow yams. 😂🌱

The only person I’m really competing with is myself.

Business owners… please tell me I’m not alone. 😂👇