Confidence Collective Coach

There is something very freeing about reaching the point where you stop trying to be digestible for everyone else.

For years, I thought confidence meant becoming more acceptable.

Smaller.
Quieter.
Easier to like.
Less opinionated.
Less emotional.
Less visible.
Less me.

Absolute bo****ks.

Confidence is not about sanding yourself down until nobody has anything to say.

Because people will always have something to say.

Too loud.
Too much.
Too confident.
Too honest.
Too different.
Too happy for someone who has been through what you’ve been through.

Let them.

At some point, you have to decide whether you’re going to live as yourself, or spend your whole life auditioning for the approval of people who probably need to mind their own bloody business.

I choose myself.

The scars.
The mouth.
The humour.
The opinions.
The purpose.
The joy.
The whole lot.

Because the most confident version of you is not the one everyone approves of.

It’s the one you stopped apologising for.

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Love To Be was EPIC!

Danced my socks off and felt like I was 26 again..... I bloody love dance music and great vibes!

Can't wait to do so it again ❤️

Thank you to my fab friends for a f**king brilliant day and looking after this is bird 🤩❤️🤩

Sometimes life absolutely floors you.

The relationship ends.
The diagnosis comes.
The job changes.
The kids grow up.
Your body changes.
Your confidence disappears.
You look around and think, “How the f**k did I end up here?”

And then, somewhere in the middle of the mess, life hands you a chance to rebuild.

Not a pretty, polished, Pinterest version of rebuilding.

The real kind.

The kind where you cry, doubt yourself, get scared, take tiny steps, make mistakes, change your mind, find yourself again and slowly become someone you’re actually proud of.

But when that moment comes, you cannot half-arse it.

You cannot keep one foot in the life that drains you and one foot in the life you say you want.

You have to choose yourself properly.

Your 30s, 40s and 50s are not too late.

They might be the exact years you finally stop living for everyone else and start building a life that actually feels like yours.

Keep going, my darling.

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Losing parts of your body does something to you.

It changes more than your reflection.

It changes how you stand in front of yourself.

And rebuilding that relationship is not as simple as saying, “love your body” and cracking on.

Sometimes you grieve.
Sometimes you feel disconnected.
Sometimes you feel angry.
Sometimes you feel relieved.
Sometimes you feel proud.
Sometimes all of it happens in the same bloody week.

That is why body confidence after surgery, illness or huge change has to be deeper than appearance.

It cannot just be about liking what you see in the mirror.

It has to be about respect.

Respect for what your body has carried you through.

Respect for what it still allows you to do.

Respect for the choices you make because they feel right for you, not because they make other people more comfortable.

Going flat was right for me.

Not because everyone would understand it.

Not because it fitted some perfect idea of femininity.

But because it helped me feel like myself again.

And that matters.

Your body does not have to look how the world expects for you to stand in it with pride.

You do not have to apologise for scars, flatness, softness, change, age, treatment, survival or choosing what feels right for you.

This body is mine.

And I’m f**king proud of it.

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A week.in Menorca with a long time friend is never a bad idea

What a wonderful time we had

Making memories ❤️

Am absolutely fab time camping in The New Forest with friends and wild ponies - this is a very special place.

Feeling tired but now to get ready for my next holiday in a few days.

The summer is going to take some topping.

My heart is full ❤️

Thank you to some very special people for great memories

I choose to live with cancer.

I know that might sound odd, but many people, when they’re told they have stage 4 cancer, understandably let it consume them. It becomes their identity, the focus of every conversation and every decision. I made a choice very early on that I wasn’t going to let that happen to me.

I LIVE with cancer. Cancer is something I have, not who I am.

I was Jo Mason before cancer. Now I’m JO FU***NG MASON.

I was strong before cancer, now I’m a FU***NG FORCE!!!

The really strange thing is that I do thank cancer for giving me a better life.

Not because cancer is a gift. I’d get rid of it tomorrow if I could… It forced me to make changes that I should have made years ago.

Since then, I’ve started doing all the things I’d always talked about doing.
- I started my dream business.
- I bought a campervan called Vandy Pandy.
- I’m away all the bloody time making memories with family and friends.
- I’ve stepped into public speaking, been on podcasts and met some incredible people along the way.

What makes me sad is that it took cancer for me to start properly living.

Please don’t let that be your story.

You don’t need cancer, a breakdown or a crisis to start making changes. And those changes don’t need to be huge.

Sometimes it’s simply about doing more of the things that bring you joy, fulfilment and happiness, and less of the things that don’t.

It’s never too late to change your story.

If you’d like to join a community of women who are doing exactly that, DM me COMMUNITY.

Let’s start making those changes - No crisis required.

Some of the lifing times of the past few weeks.

My birthday, times with friends and the AWESOME Take That.

Everyday I chose to LIVE with JOY!

**kthefear

It’s time we celebrated middle-aged women more.

Anyone that says middle age or older isn’t the best time can kiss my ass!

We’re constantly told to fear getting older. Fear wrinkles. Fear menopause. Fear grey hairs. Fear becoming invisible.

Meanwhile, middle-aged women are out here holding families together, building careers, navigating life’s biggest challenges, supporting everyone around them and somehow still finding the strength to keep going.
- We’ve earned our laugh lines.
- We’ve earned our wisdom.
- We’ve earned the right to stop apologising for taking up space.

As I’ve got older, I’ve realised that middle age isn’t something to mourn.

It’s something to celebrate.

I care less about what people think.

I’m more confident setting boundaries.

I’m more comfortable being myself.

I have less patience for bu****it and more appreciation for the things that actually matter.

I wouldn’t swap the woman I am today for the woman I was 20 years ago.

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Today I turn 46.

And if there’s one thing I’ve learnt, it’s this…

Life is far too short to spend it waiting.

Waiting for the right time.
Waiting until you’re more confident.
Waiting until the kids are older.
Waiting until work settles down.
Waiting until life feels easier.

Because the truth is, life never really stops happening.

The older I’ve got, the more I’ve realised that confidence isn’t something you magically wake up with one day. It’s built every time you trust yourself, take action and do the thing that’s been sitting at the back of your mind for years.

My birthday wish for every woman is simple:

Stop waiting.

Take up space.

Be more of yourself.

Protect your peace.

Spend your time on the people, places and experiences that matter.

Trust yourself more.

And remember that it’s never too late to change your story.

I’m 46 today and I can honestly say I’m happier, more confident and more comfortable in my own skin than I’ve ever been.

Not because life is perfect.

Not because everything has gone to plan.

But because I’ve stopped waiting for permission to live it.

If today is the reminder you needed to start that thing you’ve been putting off, take it.

The future version of you will thank you.

CLICK LIKE and FOLLOW for more lessons on confidence, courage and living unapologetically.