Ciku wa Njenga

The grief of knowing you are capable of more but not knowing where to start: You are smart enough to see the gap between where you are and where you know you could be. That awareness alone is its own kind of torture - because you cannot unknow it. You cannot unsee the potential you carry. But the staring point is blurry and the path is unclear and you are stuck between the knowing and the doing in a way that exhausts you.
I'm dying my people 😭

A person who doesn't want to lose you but also won't choose you can leave you in one of the most painful places to be. They give you just enough hope to keep you holding on, but never enough love, commitment, or consistency to make you feel truly secure. You stay caught between what they say and what they do, waiting for a future that never seems to arrive. No one deserves to live in that uncertainty. It's so exhausting.

I'm dying my people 😭

Every time I get hurt, I swear I'll go cold. But I never do. I laugh, I care, I stay soft—even when life gives me every reason not to. Pain stings for a moment, but it never hardens me for good. Maybe I never learn. Or maybe I just have a heart that refuses to stop being kind. Either way, this is who I am.