Holy Recipes for Successful Life

My younger son was turning four at that time. One day, he asked me a very powerful yet surprising question; “Dad, do we not pray each day like this; Give us this day our daily ‘bread’? Actually, I don’t like bread that much. Is it fine that I pray ‘give us this day our daily McDonalds, instead?’ Wow… that was a good one!

The next one is from my elder one who was around five. As we were driving back after a delicious drive through purchase, I thought it was the convenient time to have some conversation with them about something helpful in life. “You guys need to study hard, become good and try to help many people. How long do you think I will be purchasing things for you?” “What? Do we not have our wallet and cards?” His question. I said, “Yes, we do have them, as long as your Dad and Mom go to work. But don’t you think we will be old and die one day leaving you guys alone?” Then he said, “Yes, I know that. But, what to worry about that much. You will be going to heaven, right?” I thought for a moment. It is a sin to think that we won’t get to heaven! I said, “Yes, we will go. But that’s not the issue here. You need to work hard, learn well, and try to have a nice life, when we are gone.” Then he said this; “Would you mind giving your wallet to us, when you die and go to heaven?” Younger one was overhearing all these conversations and added; “Will you try all your best to go to work from heaven as well?”

Another tremendous faith-talk was from my little one when he was around four. One day he came to me with a paper and pencil and asked me; “Dad, can you spell me the word ‘costly’?” He was about the time learning simple spellings like car, bat, pin etc. Why should he try this hard one? Out of curiosity I asked him; “What is it for? Why you need it?” He said, “I would like to write a letter to Santa saying that I need a ‘costly’ gift this time. I don’t want one so cheap like last time!” A good one again…!

A stunning discussion happened last day. As we were going for Mass, my elder one asked me; “Why we kids are not allowed to receive the Jesus Bread? Why y’all only do that?” I said, “if we receive Jesus, we will become better each day. You will be able to do that soon.” Then they are saying, “are we kids not supposed to be better? There is no wonder we do some bad stuff occasionally.” I thought I didn’t put it right. Anyway, the discussion was going further. I notice them often looking inside our hands while we receive Jesus. He said, “Dad, you said it is the body and blood of Jesus. But are we not supposed to see red color because of the blood?” I said, “It is Jesus himself. You may take two more years to understand that fully. That’s why kids are not given this at your age.” Then he really surprised me with his response; “It is Jesus? Then, is it like Jesus dressed up in the costume of bread and wine, like we did in school on all saints day?” Wow… That made me think deep. I said, “Yes, you got it.”

Faith-talks at home!

My point in writing all these incidents was to stress how important is faith related talks at home. Many holy Popes have insisted that especially St. John Paul II. I remember him saying ‘the response to fear is not courage, but faith.’ On a practical level I tried this at home. When my five-year-old told me that he is bit scared of going into the dark, I told him; “why you have to be scared? Jesus is with you. The Guardian angel is with you.” My thinking was, if faith is the answer to fear, then he should feel like someone is with him as I or anyone goes with him, instead of just asking him to be courageous. He told me later; “Dad, when you say that Jesus is with me, I feel more confidence, I feel much safer.” Yes. The response to fear is simple; believe that someone is with us to take care of us.

Math teachers say that it is when a family buys pizza, that a more convenient time to teach kids about ‘fractions’ come around. They can grasp and explain concepts like ½, ¼, etc. in the dining table itself. I am thinking about such moments of faith-talk at home that would fill our children with faith. While parents thank for something that happened well in family, when a family submit a prayer intention together and wait for God’s response, when age-appropriate moral talks are genuinely done at home… these moments would give life-long base for faith-life in our younger generation.

Last one; I asked my elder one: “Would you rather live in a mansion, use all money for yourself and go to hell, or live in a normal house, help many people, and go to heaven? His answer: “I would rather live in a mansion, give enough space for needy people there, because they never had the opportunity to live in a mansion, and go to heaven, instead!”

Evil enslaves people! For example, the habit of excessive smoking creates addiction in many people. Extreme alcohol use makes people addicted. Unreasonable obsession for wealth makes people slaves. Carnal desires lead to the tendency of addiction in humans... Thus, all the unwanted, evil tendencies enslave most of us in a very short time! In simple terms, if we start doing wrong things, then we can't stop doing it. This is the experience of many people. The basic nature of evil is to enslave people and make them strangled to do it, even if they don't want to.

Why does it not happen with good things?

On the other hand, why is it that a person who prays daily or attends Mass finds it difficult to continue doing it without failing? Why is it that a person who regularly prays for even thirty, thirty-five years has to force himself/herself, fight within themselves to continue that? Why is it that a person who recites the rosary every day, needs to use inner strength to do that all the time they want to do it?

Even though we have been doing good and praying for so many years, we should use force to do and continue these good deeds the next day, and fight against the laziness to do so. In our human experience, we have never heard that someone has become a slave to goodness by doing good, or someone falls into ‘the enslavement of doing charity.’ Pray and pray for years, but no one has ever heard of someone being addicted to prayer (sincere prayer)!

This is not only in Spirituality!

This is true even in secular world, not only in matters of prayer and spirituality. A person who desires to work hard in office has to be committed and fight against the temptation to be lazy. A student who wishes to study well has to trigger their work ethic every day. In simple terms it is difficult to study well watching a video, than merely watching some useless content, however interesting the instructional material is framed. Goodness never addicts, they must be done with freedom and choice. No one is ever addicted to giving donations, or giving out charitable goods, but do we have to use that much strength to spend on luxurious things that are not much useful in life?

The above-mentioned plight of human beings can be thought of as the impact of original sin, an inclination towards evil other than good. This just means that we are more pruned to ‘fall’ in evil than in ‘good.’ Just as gravity forces leaning things to fall to where they are leaning to, so human beings ‘fall’ into sin, but need to use force to do good or swim against the current of gravity.

Satan plays with our freedom!

Evil likes to enslave us! That is a truth. A person who starts doing evil soon looses the utmost goodness that God has endowed us with – Freedom. Enslavement happens when one loses the freedom to do, or not to do something. This is what happens with evil-doing.

On the other hand, God never takes away the freedom of anyone who does good. They are still left with their freedom, yes even after 50-60 years of doing it daily! We can decide to still do it, or not to do it. But evil does not leave us with that scope. It encroaches into the ‘freedom’ area for the first time we do something bad. While evil tries to tamper our ability to make decision, God always keeps that ability intact in human beings.

“He who commits sin is a slave to sin.” When the Bible speaks this way, this shows that all evil actions have more to do with our freedom than just the act. The primary concern is whether we are free or slaves. Selfishness, pride, carnal desires… are we still free or ‘fall’ into them.

In short, good things never enslave us because God doesn’t want to tamper with our freedom but likes to keep it intact. The intention of the Evil one is to play with our ability to make decisions on the first instance of doing it, and work around making us slaves rather than being free, so that he can force us to continue doing it.

A sage was travelling with a group of sailors on a ship that used sails to harness the power of the wind and move forward. The ship was moving in the sea quietly with the wind until there was a troublesome wind, and the powerful waves partially destroyed the sails. Moreover, the unpredicted wind was moving towards a sea gulf or a large inlet from the ocean where cruel killer sharks resided. All of them panicked, and some intelligent sailors brought down the sails to bleed the wind. It was an effort to stop the ship moving to that dangerous inlet, and the calm shore was in the opposite direction.

The sage looked cool! Some of them were even angry and shouted; “Why don’t you care? Can you at least pray for a miracle?”
The sage said, “Of course, I am praying for a miracle. But now that you have put down the sails, there is no point in praying it seems. Because, while we pray God will work miracle and turn the wind in the opposite direction. At that time, if we are not prepared to receive the miracle, there is no way we can escape. So, if you could please lift the sails, I will continue to pray.”

Some sailors were upset and shouted, “Are you going to bring us into trouble fast?” Anyway, a few believers were ready to follow the instruction and did what the sage said. After a few minutes the wind started blowing in the opposite direction and the ship was able to move away from danger.

We pray a whole lot and wait for the miracles! But how many of us are really prepared for the miracles? There is the incident of a group of people coming together to pray for rain because their land had no rain for months. A small boy, knowing that he was going to pray for rain had taken an umbrella with him!

Our mind, thinking, words and actions should drain faith. Despair and words of failure emerges from lack of faith. A heart of sadness and a heart of faith does not go together. Elijah was praying for rain (1 Kings 18: 41-46) and he sent men several times to look for clouds. It was really a funny act in the land where there was no rain for years. Also, he says to King Ahab, “harness up and go down the mountain before the rains stops you.” After all these acts and words of faith, we read, “all at once the sky grew dark with clouds and wind, and a heavy rain fell.”

The Book of Joshua Chapter 3 describes the Israelites crossing the waters of Jordan. As per the direction of Joshua, the people moved towards the undivided sea first. But the Bible says, “When those bearing the ark came to the Jordan and the feet of the priests bearing the ark were immersed in the waters of Jordan… the waters flowing from upstream halted…”

Faith without words and actions is futile. Sadness, despair, discouraging words… all show lack of little or no faith. Let all our prayers be strengthened with words and actions of faith.

Oftentimes, it is a mystery… “When we decide to become better and improve our life, why do our struggles increase?” A new year resolution, building a healthy relationship, starting some holy routines, daily prayer… everything that is going to build us up are continuously resisted and confronted from within and without! We would feel like the whole world is against us, just because we decided to do something good!

It is the universal experience of human beings that a decision to be better oftentimes invites struggles into life. After every good decision and resolutions, people seem to face pain, temptations and struggles of all sorts.

Some explain it as the devil's resistance. May be true. But I would like to think about it with a different perspective.

Imagine a house owner who plans to build a two-storey building and enters into a contract with a builder. The builder starts his work paving the base foundation. But later, after some good thoughts and finding other sources of wealth, the owner wishes to increase the stories to ten. Once he shares the idea with the builder, the first thing the builder would do is to deepen the foundation and that requires removing more mud, breaking rocks, and taking away all undesirable things. Because the builder knows a ten-storey building can't be built on the foundation of a two-storey base.

A good decision is always our determination to build higher. We plan something different from what we had been doing. As a good engineer, God will be allowing situations to strengthen our base and to move towards our dreams. So, we will have just to wait and trust in God.

Virtues grow when they are confronted with vices. Humility grows when we have opportunities to be humble. Patience grows when it is tested with real time instances of practicing patience. Don’t panic while we show symptoms of growth, just move forward!

All people love success. But that doesn’t always come in handy for many. Sometimes, people lack the confidence even to try because they believe they are limited and have shortcomings. Yes, we are limited, and we have limitations, but that doesn’t limit us in being successful. Never ever focus on the negative side of life while moving forward. No free journey is possible by getting rid of our shadows!

There is the folk tale of a boy who wanted to learn the martial art of Judo. He was differently abled and didn’t have his left hand from birth. Approaching a well-versed Master, he expressed his desire:

The boy: “Master I would like to learn this martial art.”

The Master: “I see that you will have to put in extra effort to go with others.”

At first the Master discouraged him and tried to send him back. But the boy insisted. Later, the Master started training him. The surprising fact was that the master taught him ‘just one trick.’ And that was repeated for many days and months.

The Boy: “Master, is this the only thing I need to learn. As you know I have to learn more than others.”

The Master smiled and continued his training with that ‘particular trick.’ One day there was a rather big tournament. The boys’ Master invited him to join the team. To everyone’s surprise the boy passed several rounds with that ‘peculiar tactics.’ At last, he became the champion, defeating the finalist! He ran to the Master with tears rolling down his eyes.

The boy: “Master, how did it happen? I can’t believe it.”

The Master smiled again and said: “There was only one way to stop you while you used that particular trick. It was to catch hold of your left hand! Your opponents had to come up with something fresh and new, within seconds, to stop you, as you did not have the left hand. I was training you to use your weakness as a weapon.”
First time in life, the boy thought something great about his helplessness.

If at all we can get rid of our shadows, it is by immersing ourselves in the Ultimate Light.

We cannot succeed in life without God, the real Master. Once we have the ‘Absolute Goodness’ with us, everything substantially good comes to our life naturally. We lose control of our life as we set our step away from God. He is more worried about our danger, than His pain in losing hold of us. If we strain our relationship with God, our capacity for building good relationship with ‘anyone’ is affected.

If God is not our ‘first’ priority, then the problem is with our ability to prioritize and that would naturally push us into troubles. Setting order in life would mean setting priorities and bringing God back to the first place. There is a chance that we lose control of our life, when we think ‘we could control’ our life without God. Ultimately, God is ‘in charge’ of everything. We are just custodians, even of our lives.