VanWert Counseling & Wellness, LLC

Today, our hearts are with survivors of sexual assault.

In light of the recent attention surrounding the allegations at Cornell, we are reminded of something that extends far beyond one case, one campus, or one community:

Sexual assault is a reality that affects far too many people and far too many survivors suffer in silence.

According to the most recent national data, an estimated 443,634 r**es and sexual assaults occur each year in the United States among people age 12 and older. Even more sobering, approximately 73% of r**e and sexual assault victimizations are never reported to law enforcement.

Behind every statistic is a person.

A person who may be questioning what happened.
A person who may be afraid no one will believe them.
A person who may blame themselves for something that was never their fault.

A person who may struggle with shame, anxiety, depression, PTSD, relationships, trust, intimacy, or simply feeling safe in their own body again.

And sometimes, survivors don't tell anyone for days, months, years
or ever. That doesn't make what happened less real.

Trauma does not always look the way people expect it to. Survivors may freeze. They may minimize what happened. They may continue interacting with the person who harmed them. They may remember things differently over time. They may not immediately recognize what happened as assault. They may fear the consequences of speaking up.

None of those responses make someone less deserving of compassion, support, or advocacy.

This is why victim advocacy matters.

Advocacy means creating spaces where survivors can speak without being shamed, blamed, questioned, or pressured into making decisions before they are ready.

It means believing survivors deserve to be heard.

It means helping people understand their options and connect with appropriate resources.

It means recognizing that seeking help does not have to mean immediately reporting to law enforcement or pursuing a particular course of action.

And it means standing beside survivors while they navigate systems that can feel overwhelming and re-traumatizing.

At VanWert Counseling & Wellness, we believe survivors deserve compassion, dignity, safety, and trauma-informed care.

We believe the responsibility for sexual violence belongs with the person who chooses to violate another person's boundaries- not with the clothing someone wore, the amount they drank, where they went, who they trusted, or what they did afterward.

And we believe survivors should never have to carry their experience alone.

If you or someone you love has experienced sexual assault, confidential support is available through RAINN's National Sexual Assault Hotline at 800-656-HOPE (4673), by chat at RAINN.org, or by texting HOPE to 64673.

A message from a marriage/relationship therapist 💭:

Sometimes the hardest thing to admit in a relationship is, “I’m not unhappy enough to leave… but I’m not happy enough to feel fulfilled.”

There may not be a major betrayal, constant fighting, or one big problem you can point to.

You still love each other.
You still make plans.
You still laugh together sometimes.
You still care deeply about one another.

And yet… something feels different.

Maybe you miss feeling desired. Maybe you miss the conversations that used to last for hours instead of only talking about schedules, responsibilities, and what needs to get done. Maybe you find yourself wanting affection but hesitating to reach for your partner because you don’t want to feel rejected, needy, or like you’re “bothering” them.

So, little by little, you adjust.

You ask for less.
You bring things up less often.
You stop initiating as much.
You tell yourself, “This is probably just what happens after being together for a long time.”

But there’s an important piece of relationship psychology that often gets overlooked:

Adaptation is not the same thing as connection.

You can become accustomed to emotional distance while still being hurt by it.

And wanting more closeness doesn’t mean you’re ungrateful for what you have. It doesn’t mean your partner is a bad partner. It means there may be needs, patterns, or conversations in your relationship that deserve attention.

Healthy relationships aren’t relationships without disconnection. Every couple experiences periods of distance. What matters is whether you can recognize the distance, understand what is contributing to it, and find your way back toward one another.

Sometimes the first step isn’t fixing everything.

It’s simply being brave enough to say:

“I miss feeling close to you. I don’t want us to just coexist. I want us to feel connected again.”

Photo credit: The Relationship Boss

“I’m so blessed” and “this is hard” can coexist. 🤍

I think sometimes we put so much pressure on ourselves to be grateful that we forget we’re also allowed to be tired.

You can love your life and still feel overwhelmed by it.
You can be grateful for your children and still need a break.
You can love your job and still feel burned out.
You can be surrounded by people who love you and still feel lonely.
You can recognize how fortunate you are and still have days where everything feels heavy.

One feeling doesn’t cancel out the other.

Mental health isn’t about convincing ourselves that everything is okay because we have things to be grateful for. It’s about making room for all of what we’re feeling without judging ourselves for it.

You don’t have to choose between gratitude and honesty.

Both can be true.
Both are human.
And neither makes you ungrateful.

Sometimes giving ourselves permission to acknowledge the hard parts is exactly what allows us to appreciate the beautiful parts a little more. 🤍

We’re excited to announce that VanWert Counseling & Wellness is now IN-NETWORK with Curative Health Insurance! 💙

We’re always looking for ways to make quality mental health care more accessible to our community, and we’re excited to be able to welcome even more clients through this new insurance partnership.

If you’ve been thinking about starting therapy, now may be a great time to reach out! Whether you’re looking for support with anxiety, depression, relationships, life transitions, trauma, or simply want a safe space to talk, we’re here for you. 🫶

📞 Call us at 570-209-9873
📧 Email: [email protected]
🌐 www.vanwertcounselingllc.com

Come as you are. We’re here to help. 💙

VanWert Counseling We believe healing begins in a space where you feel safe, heard, and supported. Our practice is dedicated to providing compassionate, evidence-based care for individuals and families navigating life’s challenges. We understand that seeking support takes courage, and we’re honored to walk alongsi...

🍂 The days are getting a little darker a little sooner, and schedules are changing! 🍂

At VanWert Counseling & Wellness, we understand that life gets busy, and finding time for your mental health can be challenging.

That’s why we’re excited to share that we’ve opened additional virtual sessions for prospective clients with busy schedules! 📲

Whether you're balancing work, family, school, or everyday life, we're here to help make mental health care more accessible and convenient.

📧 Email: [email protected]
📞 Call: 570-209-9873

Reach out for more information or to schedule your appointment. You don’t have to navigate life’s challenges alone. 💙

“In the midst of our grief and the memory of our loss, we gather and remember: We have feared the terror of the night; We have seen the sacrifices of the brave; We have cried the tears of the lost, and we have clenched our fists and raged against the pain and damage. We have wept and mourned, lashed out and retaliated, we have healed and hoped. Now we gather to be whole and to walk humbly with our God as the years unfold... Thus bless those who gather and remember this day. Bless those who seek the healing after the hurt, and grant us the wisdom we need in this year and all that follow: that we may reap what is of life even in the midst of death.”

We will never forget 🇺🇸❤️🤍💙

You can love someone and still need boundaries with them. 💙

Loving someone does not mean you have to tolerate everything they say or do.

You can care deeply about someone and still say:
✨ “That’s not okay with me.”
✨ “I need some space right now.”
✨ “I’m not willing to have this conversation while we’re yelling.”
✨ “I understand how you feel, but I’m still going to make the decision that’s right for me.”
✨ “I love you, but I cannot keep participating in this pattern.”

Boundaries aren't punishment. They aren't rejection. They aren't a way to control someone else's behavior.

Boundaries are about deciding what you will and will not accept, participate in, or allow access to in your life.

And sometimes, the hardest boundary to set is with someone you love.

If you've spent years keeping the peace, avoiding conflict, or putting everyone else's needs before your own, setting boundaries can feel uncomfortable- even selfish.
But discomfort doesn't mean you're doing something wrong.
Sometimes, protecting your peace requires disappointing someone else.

You can love someone without losing yourself in the process.

If you're struggling to set boundaries, communicate them, or maintain them without guilt, you don't have to figure it out alone. Our team is here to help you learn healthy boundary-setting skills, build confidence in communicating your needs, and work through the emotions that can come with putting yourself first.

📩 Reach out to us to learn more about how counseling can help.