Andy Sparks

If I'm going downtown for a man, the one thing he can do to make it last even longer. Is to take his hand on the back of my head, maybe grip my ponytail, and gently support. Me as I go up and down, up and down. It is so freaking hot and I wish more guys knew to do it

If he plans you a date and you didn't even have to ask, you shouldn't even be waiting until you get home to milk that man. You need to be doing it from the passenger seat of the car, okay? I promise you that man will never feel so appreciated in his life

If that man wakes up at 4, 5, or 6 a.m. to go to work, Baby, that man better not be waking up to an alarm. That man best be waking up to your mouth, A hot shower running, some hot breakfast on that table, His work clothes laid out, and his lunch pack. That is how you make a man happy. That is how a man should be woke up every single morning

Guys, I freaking went home with a man and I was like, listen, we can't do anything because I don't really know you. I just want to kiss. I want to cuddle. The liquor is flowing. Just set the scene for you. Tell me why we dry for two hours to the point where I am sore and I am bruised for my, are my pelvic bone? My pelvic bone is bruised that I am more sore from this and I've been sore from doing the dirty in the vest. Like I, I didn't even know this was possible. I didn't eve…

I realized I matured when I stopped fu***ng thinking it needed to be a hairless fu***ng bald cat. And I grew a fu***ng bush. Like a real fu***ng woman.

If I'm sick and my man wants some, then I'm like, no, like we can't, like I'm too sick.The second I'm done being sick,
I'm giving that man fu***ng all four of my ... Okay? Because he deserves it. Like I've been putting off way too long.

If that man is coming home after working ten, twelve hours a day, baby, that man better not be walking into stress. That man better be walking into a clean house, a hot meal on the table, and a little bit of peace. His shoes ought to come off, his favorite drink ought to be waiting for him, and somebody ought to be asking him how his day went. That is how you make a man feel appreciated. That is how a hardworking man should be welcomed home every single evening. Forget the drama.

And another thing is is I will never ever ever.Date a guy. Officially if I have never test driven him, okay? I'm not gonna buy a fu***ng car if I've never test driven at first.So why would I commit to?
Someone if I haven't test driven, you know like.

Everybody has met someone that they want to absolutely ... the s**t out of. Okay, so if somebody sent this to you ... it's because they want to s**t out of you