Tiffany Holt

Doxie mom

My review that absolutely no one asked for… 🤷🏼‍♀️

Alani really looked at Purple Cotton Candy and said, “You know what this needs? More childhood trauma.” 😂

Because this is NOT Purple Cotton Candy.

This is Prescription Strength Nostalgia.

One sip and I was immediately transported back to being 8 years old, sitting on the couch with an ear infection, a fever of 102, sticky fingers, and a fresh dose of grape medicine. 🤣

The flavor breakdown:

🍇 75% grape children’s Tylenol

🎠 15% cotton candy that lost a fight with the fairground pavement

💊 10% decisions that seemed good at the time

That first sip had me staring at the can like:

“Bestie… are you an energy drink or am I about to be excused from my HIIT session?” 😭

And what I need to know is who was in the Alani taste-testing meeting, took a sip of this, made direct eye contact with everyone in the room, and confidently said:

“Yep. That’s it. That’s the flavor. Print the labels.”

Meanwhile, I’m over here funding this company single-handedly and still getting trust issues from every new release. 😂

Sincerely,
A woman who has spent enough money on Alani to qualify for shareholder meetings and voting rights.

i have another idea for you!!!!!!

My older loves

New hair!