Barbarian Barbering Co.

Today was the shop’s eight year anniversary and our spot has been here for ten years. Man, it is wild to think about. I am so crazy about this town and the people in it. Owning my business humbles me in ways I love and that definitely hurts sometimes. But it is the humans that sit in my chair every day that changes me. For that I am so, so grateful. Thank you for keeping this weird organism alive. I didn’t tell anyone about the anniversary except for my dudes that came in today. Lucky for us my friends decided to come in to play some music. Thank you, “Living Room” for filling our souls with joy. This was the most perfect way to celebrate. (Even if you didn’t know.) 🖤☠️🖤

I realize I have been different the past two years. I haven’t shown up in the way I would have liked. Some of you have stayed… some of you have gone. Either way—I love all of you and think of you often. I have lost a long lasting relationship, a sister whom I loved ever so deeply, and now it is with a heavy heart I share the news with you that our Dear Prudence will no longer “open up her eyes.”

That being said… I’m not going back to the person I was.

But, as her song says… “The birds will sing and you are part of everything.

And they do. Last year when Prue got sick, I took time off work to teach her to walk again. I was so distraught and she so very scared. Her walks were her joy. We needed the time to pause. We haven’t had it in so very long. During this, she taught me to listen to the birds again. My heart grew so much while it broke at the same time. I realized how short, precious, and quick life is.

During this time, my sister died. All the while she was so worried about Prue. She even took care of her right before. It was a whirlwind. I loved both of them so very very much and they loved each other dearly. I can’t talk about my sister too much because it is too tender and it doesn’t need to be talked about here. However, she was the most incredible woman… and it hurts too much for me and I want to respect my family.

Prue’s life ended as I held her in my arms, in her favorite place, in the mountains, with all of her favorite things surrounding her while the sun set on the river. Her beautiful honey eyes locked into mine without hesitation. I got to sing to her, and I told her all of my favorite stories about her.

I swept literal tears off her face telling her everything would be okay. I knew she worried about me—but I reassured her I was going to be alright. I cried, and she went very peacefully knowing that everything would be alright… I kissed her—And then my baby girl left this world.
We couldn’t have asked for a sweeter goodbye. 💕 I want everyone to know that.

It is very, very painful still. I don’t think anyone is ever prepared for it no matter how hard they try. And believe me… I tried for years. Even though she isn’t my first loss, I knew she would be one of my very deepest.

My Scooby girl has been everything to me for so very, very many years. She has always been the keeper of my soul, and the greatest the love of my life.

Every death I have ever experienced has been tragic. Hers was as beautiful as it could have been. She went out as gracefully as she lived. She was as much as an angel as I believe in them.

Thank you to everyone who has ever loved her. It means more to me than you could ever know—Even if it was just for a minute…

I want you all to know that throughout the last two years I have focused on myself. I know it hasn’t always seemed what is best for my shop, my relationships, and so many other things… but I have done what I needed to. That being said, I am going to try and encompass her strength to make me a better human. I don’t know what that means yet. But I’m sure she and Niki will show me the correct way to do that. 💕

I heard something the other day. “In order to be free, you have to let go…” That hit me so hard.

Cheers to what the f**k this means. Am I right? I guess we will see. Time, maybe…

I share this with you because you have been so vulnerable with me. I love you all. Thank you for everything. Thank you for deeply loving her, and thank you for your patience. I hope I can gain your trust, love and everything else that encompasses that. Again, I’m so grateful.💕💜💕