Hall of the Above

Petaluma, CA | September 22, 2026

Dredging operations associated with the restoration of the Trestle Promenade on the Petaluma River have led to what local historians are calling the most significant paleontological find in Sonoma County history. Crews have recovered the near-complete skeletal remains of an enormous, previously unknown species scientists are calling Pollosaurus Maximus, Latin for “Big Scary Chicken”.

Divers surveying the riverbed near downtown Petaluma first noticed bone fragments lodged in the silt that were too large for any extant species. Subsequent excavations revealed an articulated skeleton measuring more than 20 feet from claw to cockscomb. The discovery has gob smacked researchers, given Petaluma’s long-documented history as “The Egg Basket of the World.”

“We’ve always known this region had a relationship with poultry—going back generations,” said one excavator. “But we never suspected the relationship was actually a million years old.” She added: “Humans now breed poultry for food, but this thing would have eaten us for breakfast.”

Adding to the sense of dread and fascination surrounding the discovery, some community leaders have voiced concern that the disturbance of the creature’s resting place might have angered its spirit. Said one: “With all these reports of angry chickens misbehaving and whatnot, I think we might need to do something that welcomes their great ancestor and makes it feel at home. I mean, the last thing we need is some kind of giant Poultrygeist wreaking havoc on our town.”

Public Viewing Announced for Halloween Night

In a bold and unprecedented move, the recovered remains will be made available for public viewing for the first time ever on Saturday, October 31st, at Hall of the Above, an event venue in downtown Petaluma. The specimen will be displayed in the 30ft tall main space, viewable by the public for one night only. The unveiling will coincide with an evening of music and revelry, as organizers felt the best way to welcome El Pollo Mu**to was to throw a raging dance party.

We hope everyone is enjoying their summer!
Our summer break is coming to an end and we’ve lined up our Fall/Winter dance calendar with a variety of bands!! Mark the dates and we’ll see you in September! 💃

When we first announced we were opening Hall of the Above, we had a big multiple-choice list in the window naming all of the types of events you could hold in this amazing space, with the “correct answer” being Z) All of the Above. Our new suite of business cards suits this mission perfectly (swipe for the full array)✨

We are getting ready for our first-ever First Fridays line dancing night! We’ll be open late, bar open, with everyone encouraged to wear their fourth-of-July best (whatever that means for you)!

⏰ July 3. Doors are at 6:30, and dancing will go until 10!

👢 Lessons and DJ by Grapevine Dance

🎟️ $20 admission—cash or card at the door.

🕺 Kids 12 and under free. All skill levels welcome, no partner required.

🍹 We’ll have a cash bar with cocktails, mocktails, and other beverages!

🤠 And to really get you in the country mood, we’ll have a hat bar via Mad Chicks Hat Bar

See you on the dance floor!

Join us for a special double feature on May 16!

Stop in for some ice cold soda pop and sock hop tunes during Cruisin’ the Boulevard from 11-5, and then come back later for some more groovin to Spike Sikes and His Awesome Hotcakes! 🥞

Our daytime open house will be free;
Spike is $25 in advance, $30 at the door

Our bar in the evening will supplement the soda pop with alcoholic drinks and mocktails 🍻

See you there!